Last month,
we considered the nature, the essence and fulfilment of the Sacrament of
marriage. We will now look at the Sacrament as a guide, a blessing and an
experience leading us on a path to holiness.
The values
that Jesus taught us are the basic human values of
Faithfulness, forgiveness, healing,
nurturing, communication, friendship, common purpose, acceptance, commitment
for life -
“I am with you always, even to the end of
the world.”
Jesus’
promise to ‘His
bride the Church’ is our Christian model for marriage.
It is not easy for us to live up to this model. However, if we develop together
these same values, as we build our relationship together as couple, perhaps we
will see more of how Jesus is journeying with us.
“Christian couples start together as soon as
they receive the marriage sacrament, and follow up with their life by
responding to God. Every marriage is a
sacrament. We can even say that the couple enters little by little into the
sacrament. Every act which is part of it is sacramental: meals taken together,
sensual embracing, welcoming, education of children, mutual respect and even
crisis and reconciliation. Sacrament’s place is not only at the church’s altar,
but also in bed, through meals, at home.” (Xavier Lacroix)
A Community with Common
Purpose
For us to
grow as a community, we need to share our goals and the spirit that unites us.
We recognise together that we are responsible for one another. We need to
recognise that this bonding comes from God: it is a gift from God.
We can look
at the relationship of the Trinity as a community - the three Divine Persons with three
totally different missions: the Creative Father, the Saviour Son and the
Animating Spirit.
“We are more than a man and a woman that love
each other; through the sacrament of Matrimony God Himself is made present
amongst us and our spouse participates in the Trinitarian mystery.” (Lila and Carlos Cobelas
– Bogotá August 2004.)
If
community exists in this way, the couple have a common purpose. The intimacy of
the relationship brings about a love, a living and a learning
together that grows to a new openness, an awareness and a spirit of
hospitality. As the Spirit leads us, we must be aware that we are still human
and subject to our human frailty which strains against this community.
This is
developed very well by:
“Despite
our human weakness, we are invited to welcome the beauty of a face, even when
it has changed. We are constantly called to look at the face of our spouse who
entrusted his/her freedom to us. When we entrust our freedom, our face, our
heart to this creature, he/she thus becomes a link between God and us…….But we
will find it difficult to share this love fully with others if we do not learn
to listen to the silent cry of our spouse, for it is this way that we are
called to share our life.” (The Christian Couple called to live out the Marriage Covenant – Joseph
and Emanuela Lee – Rome 2003)
Spirituality
As we
develop greater awareness of our sacrament, of each other, and of the values
necessary to live our married life to the full, we start to develop an attitude
of intimacy, of openness and of hospitality. This attitude with the grace of
the Holy Spirit helps us behave in a new way, creating fulfilment of the two
persons, making each other whole in body, mind, heart and soul, while making
God real in our ordinary life.
Greater
commitment by one sustains and nurtures the other. As we journey together, we
live out our physical thanksgiving to each other through a sexual intimacy that
is both thrilling and fulfilling. Through this fulfilment we develop a spirit
of hospitality, of creativity and of caring, producing new life, biologically
and spiritually.
Our
unconditional love for each other makes God’s Kingdom become a reality here on
earth in a very human way. We become responsive to human change and growth
while faithful to our shared vision.
In this
spirit the ‘
“The Christian home is the place where the
children receive the first proclamation of the faith. For this reason it is
rightly called ‘