Study Topic for December
Introduction
In this study topic we will explore together – the Sacrament of Marriage, its nature, essence and fulfilment.
In May 2004, Pope John Paul II spoke to a group of American Bishops on the importance and the sacredness of marriage. He said:
“Family life is sanctified in the joining of man and woman in the sacramental institution of holy matrimony. Consequently, it is fundamental that Christian marriage be comprehended in the fullest sense and be presented both as a natural institution and a sacramental reality.”
Sacrament of Marriage
“At the beginning of creation God made them male and female; for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and two shall become as one. They are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, let no man separate what God has joined.” Mk 9: 6-10
It is important for us as couples to experience our marriage as sacrament. On one level the sacramental marriage of Christians proclaims, lives and celebrates the intimate communion of life and love between man and woman. On a deeper level the communion of life and love between man and woman makes explicit and proclaims the intimate communion of life, love and grace between Christ and Christ’s people, the Church. St. Paul constantly returns to the theme of marriage and the relationship of husband and wife as a covenant of love.
From the earliest recorded times marriage has been an established relationship and the family unit has been the basis for community and for society’s continuance and heritage. This is illustrated throughout the Bible.
In the 5th century, St. Augustine spelt out the detail and the obligations which were later to become the basis for the sacrament. His three essential elements of marriage are reflected in the New Catechism:
Ø The unity and indissolubility of marriage.
Ø The fidelity of conjugal love.
Ø The openness to fertility. Catechism: 1644-1652.
This was echoed by many others. But, as long as the procreative purpose of marriage was seen as primary, there was not much emphasis on this personal relationship between husband and wife. In 1939 Fr. Caffarel and the early Teams couples used the language of conjugal spirituality. It is only in the last fifty years that the relationship of the couple began to receive a general acceptance as a co-primary purpose of marriage in the Church.
Today, we talk of faithfulness, we talk of openness to each other and to the development of community and we talk about the grace of the sacrament being ministered by the spouses to each other as a loving relationship in the presence of the Holy Spirit. This reality puts more emphasis today on the importance of how we relate to each other, how we love each other as we live out our daily lives.
“God is love, and those who live in love, live in God.”
Through every action of love, we make God’s presence more real. God forms an invisible partnership in bringing our marriage to the fullness of love.
MARRIAGE AS COMMUNITY
The life of such a community of love is often spoken about as “Building the little Church” or as “Domestic Church.”
Of the seven sacraments – Baptism, Confirmation, Penance and the Anointing of the Sick have ‘individual’ orientation. Eucharist has both ‘individual and community’ orientation, while Matrimony which preserves the human race and Holy Orders which perpetuates the Church, have clear public and community purpose.
This ministering by the spouses to each other can best be achieved as set out in the code of Canon Law:
“Through their consent a man and a woman through an irrevocable covenant, mutually give and accept each other in a partnership for the whole of life, a relationship designed both for the good of the spouses through their close special unity and for the procreation and education of offspring.” Canon 1055 – 1057.
MUTUAL PROMISE AND PERSON GIVING
The sacrament – then, is the mutual promise and the living out of that commitment for life. This means that the Lord becomes present through grace in a new and deeper way at the moment of the exchange of vows itself. But this also implies that Christ will continue to be present in a unique way whenever husband and wife serve one another, make love together, forgive each other or reach out to others around them.
Spouses through their sexuality give life to each other and to the relationship. Understanding our sexuality in this way should fill us with gratitude to one another and to God for this wonderful, fulfilling, healing and reconciling experience. Very often today, sexuality is associated with oppression or as a commodity. When we deepen our quality of relationship and develop real intimacy, sexuality and the sexual act takes on the dimension that the Creator God designed it for – where the intimacy of relationship with the presence of the Holy Spirit reaches a climax of relationship with the giving and receiving, in total unity, which provides an environment of love, openness, of life-giving to each other and to the human race.
Monsignor Lafitte speaking to Teams couples in Rome 2003 said:
“The act of union between a man and a woman expresses the personal and mutual giving in marriage in which the whole person is exclusively involved. It is because marriage is a personal act of exclusive giving that it has no time limit. If the individual retained the possibility of deciding otherwise for the future, how could we speak of faithfulness? Humanly speaking, the commitment to faithfulness cannot set a time limit. It is a characteristic of the loving relationship that recognises and honours the dignity of the person to whom one commits oneself.”